Wow...it has been awhile since I have posted here. I decided tonight that I wanted to start finding ways to volunteer with the American Cancer Society. The first thing I have done is to send them my story. While not complete, I thought I would go ahead and post it here. It brings things to the present. I kept it pretty general as to faith, but I am hoping that it might be chosen for me to share it to a bigger audience.
I was 31 years old serving as a Christian missionary in Eastern Europe when I found out that the "ulcer" on my tongue was, in fact, a carcinoma. With no time to waste, my wife, 10 month old, and I travelled to Zagreb, Croatia the day after Christmas to check me in for tumor removal and invasive neck surgery to also have 7 lymph nodes removed (cancer found in one with thankfully no spread). While my wife and daughter bounced around a hotel and 2 other homes (thanks to other expatriates), I spent 10 days in the hospital trying my best to communicate with the nurses caring for me. After I checked out of the hospital, we decided that it would be best for our family for me to receive treatments back in Texas. We had a little over a week to work things out with our jobs and apartment in Europe, pack all we needed, and get back to Texas to get treatments started as soon as possible.
We knew we were loved, but the support we received from family and friends was beyond overwhelming (hyperbole is appropriate in this case). We arrived in Texas with an apartment already furnished and paid for the whole time we needed it, groceries in the refrigerator and pantry, and everything ready for us to just go straight to bed as soon as we got in the door. We were covered with prayers and love literally from all over the world.
I received 6 weeks of radiation and chemotherapy. There are three things I would note from this experience:
1. During my treatment education time, my educator shared a story with me about a woman who continued training for a marathon all the way through her cancer treatments. This spoke loudly to me and gave me the drive to continue running through the entirety of my treatments. I ran almost every other day and was still running almost 2 miles each run as I reached my last day. This helped me find hope and keep life feeling as normal as possible. To tell the truth, through weight that I lost and strength I gained back, I am running more and feeling better than I ever have in my life. I am scheduled to run my first half marathon as a St. Jude's Hero in October! I would have never dreamed this even possible 10 years ago.
2. My chemotherapy was actually from a drug known as a radio-sensitizer that helped enhance the effectiveness of the radiation. It wasn't until the day before I had to give my answer about moving forward with this treatment that the drug could cause sterility. This really scared me and broke my heart of the possibility that I could not have another child of my own. Not knowing what to do, a friend asked me if I would rather have the possibility of having another child or seeing the daughter I already had walk down the aisle at her wedding. This decision was made and I started the treatments several days later. As of today, I am writing this story in the same room as my son who is the same age as my daughter was when we found out I had cancer. His middle name is Josiah, which means "God heals." We like to call him our miracle baby. I am blessed.
3. After my surgery, I read one day about considering it pure joy when you face trials of many kinds. This was a very hard thing to grasp and comprehend, but as I think about learning that I had cancer, having surgery and a 10-day hospital stay in a foreign country, and 6 weeks of cancer treatments, I can see many things find joy in. I am stronger. I am a better man. My character has grown and I have changed. I have a story to tell (well, many to tell). I see life with a new pair of eyes on the other side of the trial and can look back to see the lessons learned, the love shown, and the life given. I am healed. I am a survivor. I have persevered. I am loved. Being surrounded by the support I had from my wife, my family, my friends, my God, I know I can face anything ahead of me.
And now, as new trials come, I can consider it pure joy that they will grow me, they will give me story to share with others who need to be loved and encouraged, and they will be overcome.
I am blessed.
